Sunday

Make Simple Decisions Quickly and Easily

A Don Juan makes simple decisions quickly and easily.

You never stutter, ponder over, or invest a good deal of mental energy in over-analyzing most of the relatively mundane decisions which must be made in romantic situations.

When you ask a girl out, you have a plan and make a specific recommendation. No, "What do you want to do? I don't know what do you want to do?" You lead. All she has to do is agree. If she doesn't agree with a particular proposal, then you lead her towards a different proposal.

A dinner date? You open the car door for her. You park in the first open spot you see. You approach the hostess requesting, "Table for two in the non-smoking area." Or if there's no hostess, you quickly survey the scene, pick out a table and head for it. (You may ask your date, "Is this table okay with you?" Nothing wrong with being polite.) You take the menu, peruse it briefly for a few minutes, then put it down and order. Once you're both finished eating, you pick the check up and pay it.

No matter what kind of date you go on, whether it's a dinner date in a restaurant, a party at a friend's house, or a day at the park, there are dozens of simple little decisions which must be made. As the man, it's your job to orchestrate the date, to take charge, to make things as easy and enjoyable as possible for the lady.

Everything should flow smoothly. In fact, she's somewhat judging you based upon how smoothly the date does "flow." If it flows, she'll conclude that the date's going well, that there's a certain chemistry between the two of you, and she will be much more likely to want to see you again.

If the date doesn't flow, i.e. lots of awkward pauses while you fret over these minor decisions, she'll begin to doubt that you are, in fact, the kind of man she's looking for. She'll begin to doubt the "chemistry."

In addition to increasing your initial dating success by increasing flow, you need to continue to make these simple little decisions - quickly and easily - even after you start seeing someone on a regular basis. Why? Because making these kinds of little decisions quickly and easily is an EASY WAY for you to garner respect.

Remember, RESPECT is one of the most important elements of a romantic relationship. If she doesn't respect you, she will never love you... or even lust after you. Garnering respect from the ladies is crucial to your romantic success.

There are lots of little ways for you to garner respect (the subject of a future article). One of the easiest is to handle these decision points with ease. It's also one of the ways that guys very frequently screw up... and they don't even realize it.

Imagine arriving at that same restaurant with your date.

You drive round and round looking for the best spot.

There's no hostess so you and her stand there and try to decide where you should sit. After a couple minutes, she picks a table and you two head for it.

The waiter comes over and asks what you'd like to drink. You think for a second, ask what they have, then after he runs down the list, you finally pick something.

When he comes back to take your order, you're still trying to decide what you want, still studying the menu. Your date's ready to order. You ask for more time.

When the check comes, you let it sit there for an eternity while trying to decide whether you should pay it, or she should pay half, or whatever.

And so it goes... on and on like this for the entire night. You faltering on simple little decisions... inhibiting flow and chemistry... and losing more and more respect in your date's eyes.

What to do? Where to park? What to order? These are all examples of "decision points" which occur quite frequently in romantic situations... and these decision points present you with the opportunity to garner respect from your lady... or to project weakness.

Of course, we're not talking about taking a dictatorial approach to relationships. If she wants to do something else, or sit someplace else, or pay for dinner... fine. These little things shouldn't really matter to you. After all, you've got your eye on the big picture -- having fun.

Remember... indecisiveness in a man is a highly undesirable trait, and will turn a woman off faster than a moldy pair of Scooby-Doo boxer shorts.

And when she doesn't kiss you goodnight, begins screening your calls, and never goes out with you on that second date... you'll have no one to blame but yourself.